You already know why breastfeeding is so good for both mother and baby. Now you need to understand how breastfeeding works. If you formula-fed, there will be several differences between the way you fed your baby and the way your grandbaby is being fed. Here's what you need to know:
- Breastmilk is supplied on a "demand/supply" basis -- the more a baby demands, the more his mother will supply.
- Breastmilk is designed to be absorbed quickly by an infant's intestine. Therefore breastfed babies need to nurse every 2 - 3 hours. A newborn will nurse 8 - 12 times in 24 hours. This is normal. It doesn't mean that he's starving. It means that he is doing what he's supposed to do!
- In order to make enough milk, Mom needs to get sufficient rest.
- A breastfed baby shouldn't have an artificial nipple or a pacifier until breastfeeding is well established. Some babies may become confused and not nurse correctly when they have something artificial introduced too early.
- Stress or fatigue will affect the mother's ability to produce milk. The hormones involved in breastfeeding are affected by adrenaline which is produced by stress. So it is important to help the new mother remain as stress-free as possible.
- Babies go through growth spurts when it seems like all they want to do is nurse. That doesn't mean that Mom doesn't have enough milk. She just needs to nurse him as often as he needs to nurse. Typical growth spurt times are 3 weeks, 6 weeks, 3 months and 6 months. However, any time a healthy baby starts nursing more frequently, he may be in a growth spurt. Mom needs to rest as much as possible and nurse frequently. A growth spurt may last from 3 to 7 days.
- Breastfed babies don't need any other food until they are 6 months old. When they show signs of readiness for solids, then they can begin. Dr. William Sears has some great advice on this topic.
What You Can Do to Help
A Grandmother can make or break a breastfeeding relationship. When you encourage your daughter or daughter-in-law in the following ways, you will contribute to her success!
- Protect her privacy. Try to ensure that she gets the rest she needs. If well-meaning friends or relatives want to visit before she's ready, help her husband run interference. Make sure you understand the boundaries that she wants enforced ahead of time. If she just wants to be with her husband and baby, then understand that, and give them their space.
- Go to bat for her. If others make negative comments about her breastfeeding, stand up for her. Tell them how proud of her you are. Never indulge in negativity about breastfeeding yourself.
- If you breastfed successfully, tactfully offer your help, but understand if she doesn't want it. Remember that this is all about her and the baby, not about you.
- Offer to help with meals or the house. A great gift would be several months' worth of maid service.
- If she has other children, keep them occupied. This can be their special time with Grandma. Their mother will be eternally grateful to you for making them feel important and freeing her up to focus on the baby.
- If you think she might be having breastfeeding problems, help her find a lactation consultant.
If both sets of in-laws live close to the new parents, both grandmothers can take turns helping. Don't allow your feelings to get hurt if the new mother calls on the other grandmother instead of you for something. However, if in-laws live out of town, then it might be a good idea to plan for the new mother's parents to come first; then the new father's parents can come a little later.
Having a grandbaby is truly a blessing, so make the most of this opportunity! Enjoy every moment with him, but remember that your job now is to support and encourage the new family in every way possible!
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